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Its not that I dont love you, its just that…I don’t want to hurt you

The bride was looking gorgeous in her designer lehenga. The groom too looked smart in sherwani. Both were busy smiling at the guests. Lights kept flashing on their faces as guests were taking pictures with them. The entire hall was decorated beautifully with flowers. The typical Indian wedding music was filled in the hall. There was rush at the food stall. People were busy talking and moving around. It was just the perfect typical wedding.

Roshni seemed sad, remembering her wedding day. She was engrossed in her own thoughts. She was not attentive to what her friends were gossiping. She was finding it difficult to believe what Rohit recently told her. His words were playing in a loop in her mind. She was smiling at times, looking at her friends. She finally could not fake more and just left the conversation and ran towards the entrance with tears rolling down her eyes. “I will handle, don’t worry,” said Rajeev looking at her friends, and ran behind Roshni. “Roshni..!!!! don’t leave like this”, shouted Rajeev as he ran behind her. “You are a liar, Rajeev..!!!”, replied Roshni as she came out of the hall. She waved towards an auto and within seconds, she left the place.

Rajeev reached his house, the door was open and he could hear Roshni crying. He stood in front of her and said, “I feel bad that you found out from Rohit, I was going to tell you”. “When?? After sending a divorce notice to me”, Roshni cried in anger. “It has just been 5 months to our marriage, Rajeev. I was so happy that we were getting along so good. If you liked someone else, why did you marry me? Ohhh, I get it, just to keep your family happy…”. “No listen…”, “No you listen”, Roshni gasped, breaking Rajeev. “You know how much I believe in arranged marriage and how much I believed you. You told me that you were no more in love with her and that you are giving me and this marriage a chance because you liked me.”, Roshni started sobbing. Rajeev came closer to Roshni, held her hand and pleaded, “Look, since 2 days I am trying to talk, you are just ignoring me. Your this behaviour is killing me. Today mom and dad are not home, so let me talk. Please listen to me. Give me a chance to explain at least. Please, I deserve it.”. Roshni just stared at the floor. “Listen, sweetie, I have no feelings for her. That kiss meant nothing to me, nothing at all. And as I told, she was the one who left me after college for a high package holder guy. Since then, we are not in contact at all, trust me. It’s just that, last week at the college reunion she met. And she approached me to give best wishes for our wedding. You were there, right?”. “Ya exactly, that is my point, you kissed her when I was there, how could you?”. Roshni cried louder. Taking bigger breaths, Rajeev continued, “She was tensed, Roshni. When I went to the parking to bring the car, I coincidently ran into her. She again congratulated me and said that she was really happy for me. She looked worried, so I asked her what was the matter. She had tears in her eyes and she felt sorry for leaving me, that guy was torturing her, she was not happy. And just to console her I went closer to her. While looking at me, she suddenly kissed me. I was startled for a moment. But trust me, first thought that came to my mind was yours. I just pushed her hard and went towards my car, witohut saying a word to her. Then I realised Rohit had seen everything. He warned me that if I don’t tell you about this incident, he will tell you. That bastard told you..!!!”. “I don’t believe you, Rajeev”, Roshni said, pushing him away. “You would have never kissed her, if you loved me. And moreover you would have never lied”, “I do realise it was a terrible mistake. Honestly, I had no guts to tell you. I was really scared. I knew, it would hurt you.” Rajeev said trying to hold her hand. “Why would it hurt me? If you are clear about your feelings and you are not lying then I will never get hurt, ya maybe, to some extent I might feel bad, but…you know how much I hate lies. When there is something suspicious, people hide.”, Roshni replied, again trying to move away from him. Finally Rajeev held her hand and pulled Roshni towards himself. Looking in her eyes, he clarified, “People also hide when they love someone so much that they don’t want to hurt their loved ones. The kiss, I agree was a mistake. But I lied and kept hiding only because I did not want to hurt you. I love you a lot”, Rajeev’s eyes glittered as water filled in them. He rejoined, “This distance between us is just hurting me. Please trust me. I am extremely sorry, it turned out this bad for us. I will never ever hurt you.” and he hugged her tight.

Finally, Roshni smiled looking at him. “I am sorry sweetie, it’s not that I don’t love you, its just that I love you so much, that I never want to hurt you”, he said while kissing her forehead.


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